C’est La Vie

I don’t know why I decided to sit down today and write something. Not like my mind is bustling with ideas at the moment. No.

It is awfully quite for a change. The usual murmurings and pointless whisperings to feed my anxiety are, surprisingly, not around. And I sit with a cup of coffee in hand, amused at life and it’s little ways, and admiring the nip in the air as we fast approach the last leg of the festive season.

There’s no denying that I feel happy. This part of the year is undoubtedly my favorite. Even with everything going wrong, it still feels right. There’s lights all around, there’s holidays and mini vacations ripe for the taking. Hell, there’s a perfect opportunity to overdress, overeat, and be merry. What more can you ask for!

Sometimes life can get so overwhelming, you know? I don’t exactly remember when I picked up on the phrase, but “It is what it is” has easily become a motto for me. I mean, it may sound bleak, but for a habitual overthinker like me, this has been quite a game changer.

I have issues with letting go of control. Took me a long while to realize this, but ever since I have, I notice the patterns in everything I do. This, in fact, is one of the most critical factors that makes me an overthinker. If I evaluate a situation from all possible angles, I could be prepared to tackle anything that comes my way, and thus, more in control. So many decisions that I have taken in the past center around this one facet. It has its benefits; it sure has its downsides.

But sometimes, clarity strikes. Or at least its distant cousin makes a visit. And I had to take stock of the situation. Sometimes, no matter how hard we try, no matter how much effort we put in, the circumstance is just not in our control. Nothing, and I do mean nothing, I could do would so much as create a dent in the surroundings. What to do then? For someone with control issues, this is a nightmare.

But sometimes, well, it is what it is. Acceptance is a Herculean task. But we can get there. I got there. Kind of. Still a long way to go to truly reach a stage where I can even begin to claim to understand mindfulness, but at least there’s a start. With time, with practice, it has eventually become a bit easier for me to start letting things go. The mundane, the ordinary, the weird, the unpleasant.

The past year with the pandemic also has a role to play in this. A global disaster of that scale sure puts everything else in perspective. And perspective is key to unlocking happiness!

Maybe that’s why I feel happy. Maybe I am on the right track to find my way back to myself again. And doing so, I keep getting one step closer to peace, to sanity.

One day at a time is another cliché we hear being thrown around, but well, clichés are clichés because they are true. Every little step counts. And, progress is progress, no matter how miniscule it may seem. Hey, if enough straws can break a camel’s back, enough teeny tiny steps can definitely lead to resounding success. The important thing is to keep going.

Sure setbacks are going to be there, but I’m sure we can overcome them with a shining smile. After all, such is life 🙂

– J

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